I'm the Game , Can you play me ??

Show me Something more thrilling than a perfect volley...
Tell me U never dreamt the immaculate strike...
Tell me That football is not our one common language...
Some may say it’s just a game...
But this is about Heroes, triumphs, loyalties, devotions...
It’s our commitment and our passion, our battle and our belief...
This is our faith...
Now feel the fever of the crowd, Hear the roar of the faithful...
This is the beautiful game. This is, your moment !!

Fck. A million things jst flashed ma mind. Nostalgia. Anywz...

For those who don't knw wht the context is, v r talkin about a religion, & that's FIFA. Personally, i love FIFA b'cause i love futbal. i can't play that well on the field, thou i want to, desperately. so i do it in d virtual world.

Those wer d days. man o man. crowd gathered behind the players who compete. sweat, shivers, mind about 2 xplode, smoke, tense surroundings. & here comes Nuno Gomez, runnin al thru d way 4m half-line, n yes, it's unbelievable, it's a GOAL !! i dreamt a lot. it was sumthin i worshipped, & cudn't afford 2 loose.

The golden days r gone. v r al dun wid clg. i thot it was gone 4 evr. GONE.

Stop. No. I can hear a knock. Am i dreamin, or is it 4 real ?? Well...

Office, work, tight schedule, pesky calls, & amidst all, cruisin it's way al d way down, as if a blazing first-touch. FIFA !! it's back !!

i'm more than glad. work, work, work, & then suddenly a brk 4 a 20-minute game. Argentina vs Brazil...Barca vs Arsenal...Liverpool vs Chealsea
things r a lil different thou. u can't yell, u can't bang tables when u concede a goal, no expletives. but then, damn - it's back. & i can't really xplain what happines it brings 2 busy minds & hefty hearts. Who says winnin or loosin dun't mattr. It dus damn it. Cum beat me, if ya can !!

I'm d game, can u play me ??

Dreams fulfilled !!

I neva thot things come is such a realistically true fashion, without a knock, without a chance to drop jaws, & unexpectedly, while u r working.

Now office is sumthin not many people wud lyk bein calld a haven. things sting at tyms. things dat mak u crave for a day off. needles 2 mention, dat forced the xpression TGIF in2 xistance (go google if u r stil ignorant). n at tyms u don't really realise that a vknd has just passd by (which is xctly what happened wid me last sunday nyt, when i, as a whippin shock, realised - 'Damn, it's office 2morrow'). Dreams comin true is a point of elation, but sumthin perfectly normal when u liv a carefre lyf. But under d tiresum circumstances as mentioned above, a dream comin tru, probably is a dream in itself. Wel, not alwz (n dat's d inspiration behind dis piece of writin).

Was scrollin thru d stuff shared by guyz on the intranet in ma office. a colleague (n a friend) of myn is so very fond of futbal, as any of the brazilian players, the point bein reflectd in his e-mail signatures, his passionate talks about futbal, his blogs, his celebration of India winnin the AFC Challenge Cup 2008, how he cursd the indian media for not coverin the victory, and d talks of his own team, their matches, n innumerabl such things.

[ Gist - fubal drips from evry drop of his blood ]

Now, 4 such a personality, what wud b a dream ? sumthin once fulfilled, is worth cherishin 4 a lyftym ? I got the answer whn i found a folder titled "UK Pics of that Sunday!". n d title itself was so captivating that i cud barely hold-on befor my fingers tapped twice 2 c what moments of glory lies within. A glimpse at the contents of that folder is included in this post

[ it is made sure that d privacy is not breached. he's not visibl here. if it stil offends u Tatha, please accept my sincere apologies ]

Arsenal !! Emirates Stadium !! u know what dat means damn it !!
hah. Been there, done that !!

On-job, on-site, working, and a lyftym dream fulfilled. damn !!
dats how lyf is ryt, suprises, surprises, surprises !!
dat smile on his face whn he poses against d arsenal logo on d stadium walls is stupendous.

Now, if dats how dreams r fulfilled -

Lord, i'm ready to work, al clad wid smiles, 24x7, 12x30, 365xinfinity,
n whtevr calculations represent a lyftym !!
Just keep ma dreams comin in please :)

First Drop In a New City !!

Ysterday !! it wasn't a downpour, a cloudburst. it didn't even crop up enough to form a sphere. it was just a glimmer, a shine, a sparkle. Out of grief or out of joy, m not very sure. But yes, it brought anxiety, a tremor, n a hel lot of thought provocation.


First job, a new city, stil a month for the first salary to b credited, n i, short on cash, with d skysoarin rent and brokerage for the flat we chose, went on to withdraw 700 bucks frm the SBI ATM, d last of what i had. As i was carefully plannin ma xpenses til money comes in, the guard posted on the ATM reached out ma hand. I didn't feel him hot then though.

[Backdrop : I first met the guard a cupl of days ago, n v conversed, later realisin that he was from a place close to ma hometown. 2000kms away frm home, n a person close frm ur place feels really like a close relative. ]

On the eventful day, he askd me for money, some of it. n i was taken back, reasonably enuf. i mean, no mattr what d amount was. u meetin a person for jst d 2nd tym in ur lyf, n he asks u for a favour, dat too a monetory one. Past swept across ma face, whence, 5 yrs back, i gav money to a person who claimed to live in a remote place nearby, as his bike was out of oil. 100 bucks, which obviously, neva came bck. So, retrospectively, i claimed petty xcuses, jstifyin sumhw,

"Sir, i can't do that"

He was stil adament, i turned furious. But when he said that he had high fever, n dat he was wearin a sweater within, in strong daylight (n he really showed it to me), i was remorseful, n realised how impolite i've become.

[Development of Thoughts: Me, or the entire society ?? Who's to blame ? Me, why ? i went thru a bad xperience once, n dat reflected in ma reaction to the 60+ man. was it my fault ? yes, it was, without d slightest tinge of doubt. but the partner-in-crime, or rather the one completely responsibl, was d man who neva gav me back those 100 bucks. was it my fault at al ??]

I askd him how much he wanted. he said "20-30 rupaye beta, bas. main kal lauta dunga aapko". my wallet had d least denomination of 100, which i offered to him, without a second thought. He was confused (i really dunno why). n he said he dusn't want dat much, instead he requestd me 2 buy him d medicine frm d nearby medical store. i did d same. n al it took was 5 minutes, and 4 rupees.

Parting ways, i laid ma hand over his shoulder, askin him to tak care, n hav d medicine on time. He gav me a smile, n i jst couldn't bear it. As i turned ma back n walked ma way towards ma flat, sumthin flickered in ma resentful eyes. I didn't let it flow, it tried to thou, but i didn't let it (they say, men don't cry).

The Matter Of Death !!

No, it's not A Matter Of Life & Death, it neva was...
it's jst The Matter Of Death, as simpl as it is !!

u may b d strongest man on earth, or u may b d happiest, or u may hv been bestowed wid evrythin u hd evr wished 4, u myt b even God, bt no, don't turn ur face on sumthin as simple as the truth...
You Fear Death, n i can bet on dat !!

it's nt ur fault i ges, it's human by nature, or rathr a law of nature which none dared 2 talk 'bout...

u myt hv not witnessed ur Gods fightin 4 long lives, bt u mst hv heard of it 4 sure...
remember d Samudra Manthan scheme of things, n al, so called Gods, fightin der guts out 2 get dat bloody pot of longetivity out of d ocean jst 4 der sake...
dats jst bout hinduism, 'coz i hv no detailed idea of othr religions, bt i ges, u cn ask ur favors each 2 tel ya if dey had dun d same stupidity !!
(i do not intend 2 hurt ne religious sentiments, in case i jst did, my heartfelt apologies)

a few days bck, i questiond a frnd of myn,

"whts ur biggest wish ??
sumthin u think is tuf 2 get, or evn impossibl, but u stil want it...
whts dat ??"

2 ma query, wht she had 2 say is dis,

"i might sound selfish, bt...
LONG HEALTHY LIFE, hapiness n peace, whichever way by money or nythg fr my parents !!!
just a thot of nt havin parents arnd smtym in future leaves me shattered...
i dream of ma dad quite often, and smtyms i find myself in tears after i wake up missin my dad..."

n i ws so srry 4 askin her out, coz mayb i brought sum not-so-merry feelings on d surface.
bt dat reply of her's made me ponder a lot, dat probably, each n evry 1 of us fears death, d axe dat's bound 2 strike on one's own self, n on his beloveds...
al v cud do is mourn ovr whts left 2 cum, or face d heat, wid al d myt n joy our heart subsumes...
(uff, dat was too bookish, damn !!)

d other day, i was listenin 2 a speech by
Steve Jobs, CEO, Apple & Pixar Animation.
therein he mentioned sum beautiful wrds, thou i've alwaz been a bit leery of such auspiciouly idealistic stuff...

"If you live each day, as if it were your last, someday, you'll most certainly be right.
No one wants to die. Even people who wanna go to heaven don't wanna die to get there.
& yet, death is the destination we all share, no one has ever escaped it. & that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of life."

i ges it's ur tym 2 ponder ovr...
i'l leave u wid a quote...

Tomorrow we shall meet,
Death and I.
And he shall thrust his sword,
Into one who is wide awake.
-Dag Hammarskjold, Markings, p. 31

Train Saga !!!

ever travelled some thousand kilometers by train, with a WL marked on your travelling ticket ??

if you haven't had the luxury, kindly do not even dream of it.
well, i've been accustomed to it, since a couple of mishaps. what better can one expect when he opts out for the eleventh hour plans for a 22 hour journey !!

ever been on a reservation counter at blood thirsty summer noons ?? the queue seems to be waiting for a few drops of heavenly water. and mind you, there have been times when i joined the line at noon, fighting through the staff's lunch breaks & frequent chat sessions, to witness the ticket window shutter being slammed on my face at 8 P.M., when i was standing right in front of it, sweat & frustration dripping from each & every part of my body.

well, rules are rules, but man is what they are born for after all. since then, i've preferred am AGENT (an unofficial copy of an official post, have a look for yourself). His work doesn't fall into James Bond categorization, but his attitude is pretty synonymous. he gets the ticket done for you, for any train, at any time, for any destination station, even at the eleventh hour, by means that are termed as trade secrets of his, jst for a bargain of a gandhian note, with a figure 100 embarked on it. you call him a crook, may God's grace be with you, b'cause then your God is the one who's gonna get u a birth (needless to say, on a train). i prefer calling him an angel, b'cause he helps those in need & takes away none from anyone deserving.

neways, in a 2 year long money-service relationship, my angel for the first time failed to deliver his words & left me up with a waiting list 3. onboard a 20 hour bound train for my destination, i enquired a TTE whether by any chance, my ticket has been confirmed. & the answer was a no, even before i could complete my begging question. he turned his back on me & kept drifting. a couple of minutes passed, & the man returned & made his eyes move so artistically indicating me to follow him, which i did, with no understanding of the circumstances

we stopped, before an empty birth & he whispered "kharcha paani".
perplexed amidst the thankfulness & frustration, i queried, a bit hesitantly "how much, sir ??" (i'd prefer replacing the title i bestowed upon him with a four letter beautiful word, after all, India is just second to frenchmen in this field). i handed him his demand of Rs.150, without bargaining, but yes, with anger. probably realising, he uttered, "i haven't asked you much", & i surrendered with a pathetic smile.

while he was making some scribblings on the reservation chart, i tried to fetch his name plate, but found it missing. what again do you call him, a crook ??? i don't give a damn & i'd prefer calling him a saviour. he took nothing from a deserving, & helped a soul in need.

do you consider me selfish & self-centred, a part of the corrupt system. oh yes i'm, & if you claim you are not, probably you don't use Saint-Gobain mirrors to reflect your soul. i love my country as much as anyone else can. i could have slept on the train floor, making the TTE beg me not to complain for his demand. what would my country have gained then !! one corrupt man eradicated, probably temporarily from the system of endless loopholes., thats it !! by giving him the money, nation still gains nothing more, but 2 of it's citizens are content, for the time-being, and that is sufficient for a mother i guess !!!

i'm corrupt, if you may say so, i'm selfish, if you may say so, but you are no different, & i can bet on that. this is what makes corruption an exponentially aggravating disease, leaving behing no possible hopes of recovery. if you claim to remove corruption from the entire system, you are probably dreaming of a wonderland, or you are likely to be insane, 'cause it would take the effort of wiping out the entire rotten crop & growing up a fresh one, requiring a few centuries or milleniums i believe.

what i suggest is the incorporation of a few unavoidable & exemplary connotations, as a part of A VIABLE SYSTEM, not corruption-free, but corruption-sustainable.

but just when i pen down these words, some voice from heaven up above yells at me, telling me repeatedly that i have not the slightest idea of what maturity & intelligibility it takes to run a nation that was once called THE GOLDEN BIRD.

hello think tanks, though unworthy, do i succeed in ringing some bells out there in your kindergardens !!!